At a time when you wonder which will come first – the police making up their minds whether or not to prosecute Ben Stokes or Christmas – there are some things in life which take a mere nanosecond by comparison with Plod finally sorting out his paperwork. Such as the time it takes for a member of the Warner family to start spouting without engaging the filter system between brain and mouth. If you had to compile a list of the 1,000 best qualified people to pass judgment on the Stokes affair, then Mrs Candice Warner, of Sydney, New South Wales, would not come close to being on it....