MARTIN JOHNSON

When I floated the idea of an opening ceremony to launch the new County Championship season (although on reflection I’m not entirely sure that some fishnetstockinged diva warbling away to the strains of a 100-piece orchestra would have them throwing their cloth caps in the air at the County Ground, Derby) it somehow slipped my mind that cricket’s oldest competition already has one.
It involves two men in white jackets walking gingerly out to the middle, pointing and prodding at various squelchy bits on the bowlers’ run-ups, and stoically ignoring the c...